Loving Yourself the Way God Loves You!

Imagine you’re a young teenage girl trying to fit in at school. You’re nose is just a little too big for your liking. See yourself as wife and how kids and career have slowed you down and you put on a few pounds. Envision yourself as a preteen boy who just isn’t as muscular as the other boys in your class. Picture yourself as a husband who no longer has to “chase after” a beautiful girl to marry so you let yourself go a little bit. You don’t have the same muscular definition and you have a little bit of a gut.

You look in the mirror and you see all these things. Now, close your eyes for a second. Take a deep breath and open. You’re looking back in the mirror, but this time you see yourself through the eyes of God, your Creator. God doesn’t see the big nose; He sees a beautiful masterpiece. He doesn’t see the few extra pounds; He sees a noble and God-fearing creation. God doesn’t see the weak and frail; He sees the work in which is well-built and strong. He doesn’t see the “gut” you’ve gained or the muscle you lost, but God sees your innermost being that is righteous and just. God looks at you and He sees Himself for “God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them” (Genesis 1:27). So you see, when you look in the mirror and think you don’t like what you see, you’re basically saying that God screwed up when He created you. God doesn’t make mistakes. He didn’t make you ugly. He made you exactly the way you are supposed to be!

In today’s society, it’s hard for anyone, man or woman, to feel beautiful about who they are and who God created them to be. There are so many pressures from the social media to be somebody we are not; to be somebody who God never intended us to be. We are inundated with commercials, billboards, magazines, movies, and more that tell us or show us how to be beautiful; that if we use their product or wear their clothes, we would be more attractive. It is very hard to feel beautiful when everything you see is telling you that you just keep falling short and you just can’t measure up. Through this, we slowly begin to lose that love we used to have for ourselves.

You see, for so many of us, it’s really easy to love others but in return, we couldn’t love ourselves in the same fashion. I went through a period not too long ago, and go through it every once in a while, when I didn’t even feel comfortable in my own skin. I wasn’t happy with myself, but instead I criticized everything that seemed to be wrong with the way I looked. I couldn’t even look people in the eye because I didn’t want them to see how ugly I felt on the inside. I didn’t feel pretty. I would spend a lot of time telling other young girls and women to be comfortable in their own bodies and that they are pretty or need to stop being so negative about their self image, but I was dying to crawl out of my skin because I couldn’t stand to look at myself in the mirror anymore. There were many times, and there are still, where I would get ready, do my hair, brush my teeth, wash my face, etc… without even looking in the mirror because I didn’t like what I saw. There were times where I looked deep and hard at the person staring back at me and during those times I didn’t know who that person was really. I was, and still am at times, a big hypocrite.

You might be struggling with this same thing. You may be in the same boat right now, but don’t jump! There will be times where you see yourself as beautiful. Like I mentioned before, I don’t feel like this all the time, either. I go through stages and seasons in my life where this tends to be brought to the surface. You may know when your vision changed for you, but I really don’t know when it all started to change for me. I never used to be like this. I was always comfortable with who I was, always had a very high self-esteem and it didn’t matter if people thought I was pretty/beautiful/or whatever. But regardless, I stopped looking at and loving myself the way Jesus saw me. I started viewing who I was by the standards and images of this world instead of putting on my “Jesus glasses” and viewing myself the way that He sees me.

This battle had been waging inside of me for a very long time. No one ever knew what was going on because I wouldn’t let them in on it. I didn’t want them to be bogged down by the things that bothered me. I hate feeling “needy” and I didn’t want to put a pressure on the people in my life for them to feel like they had to constantly try to make me feel beautiful or pretty. I didn’t want them to have to feel like they needed to say something out of obligation or just the opposite, walk on eggshells around me, because it didn’t matter what they said, the way I felt was always going to be the way I felt, no matter how many times a day I was told I was beautiful!

I didn’t want people to know that while I may be happy and bubbly on the outside, I really loathed myself on the inside. There was this internal struggle and I just felt so alone in the battle. It took me a long time to see that trying to fight this on my own wasn’t going to be successful. I needed help and that’s when I opened up to my best friend about my struggle and while I knew it wasn’t something she could really help me with, it was just nice knowing that somebody knew what was going on. I urge you, whether it is this struggle or any other kind of struggle in your life, to let somebody know. They can pray with you and for you. There is just a comfort in knowing that somebody understands you and the situation that’s going on in your life. God gave us people and friends for a reason; not to go through life alone and just coexist, but to lean on one another during difficult times.

With this battle of loving myself the way God loves me, it’s sometimes hard for me to imagine someone loving me for who I am because I just can’t love myself. I believe this is why it is so hard for me to imagine God’s unrelenting, unending, and undying love for me. I presume this would be the same for others who have gone through similar situations. However, God has been revealing something to MY heart that speaks about His love. You see, there were many times I would see little heart shaped things everywhere and I mean everywhere! I would see heart outlines in little rocks on the ground, holes in the cement, clouds in the sky; you name it, I saw a heart formation in it. I used to rationalize it by saying it was a sign that I would find someone to love; that there was love waiting for me. However, just in this last year, He showed me that those little heart shaped signs I saw everywhere was not a sign of some earthly love, but a sign of HIS LOVE for ME!! So now every time I see those heart formations, I am reminded of a God, a Creator who loves me! What a marvelous revelation!

If you know me, you know that I love hard. I love deeply. I love to a point that regardless of what that person does, I will still love them. I love them for their failures. I love them for their talents. I love just knowing I love them. But it’s not the same when I look at myself. My love for me is/was/can be superficial. My love for me did not and could not extend beyond the mirror. For so long, I was blinded by what I wanted as opposed to what I needed and what I needed was to realize that God loves me and if God loves me with all my baggage, all my faults, and all my failures, that would be all I ever needed. If God could love me like that, then why can’t I love myself in the same way? If my Creator loves me with all of my “stuff,” who am I to not love what the Creator made? It would be equivalent to me not loving the stars or the moon or the flowers or the ocean. That’s an insult to my God, my Father.

Realize that God loves you. He loves you for who you are, whether you’re fat or thin, small or tall, smart or not, rich or poor. And do you know why? It’s because He created you. He formed you and He breathed life into your lifeless body. Know that God created you to be just who you are meant to be. He created you to be BEAUTIFUL. Don’t be conformed to the image of this world, but be transformed by His love and the way He sees you! He created you with a majestic, awe-inspiring, and powerful beauty. This Creator always loves His Creations!

Love is such a deep and emotional attachment. Have you ever loved so much that you begin to hyperventilate and you can’t breathe? Have you experienced a love that is just so overwhelming and so deep that you can’t even begin to fathom its existence? This is how I feel when I truly enter into God’s presence. It is pertinent that you get into God’s presence so you can be constantly reminded of His promises about your beauty and worth. When you walk with God, you walk with a confidence knowing that you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139). I know when I get deeply into the presence of God because there is a brokenness that is revealed. He shows me that brokenness and then He whispers “I Love You. You are Beautiful.” During those times, I sometimes have to even put my hand over my heart just to make sure that it’s still beating.

Beautiful friend just always know: There’s no perfect kiss unless you have been kissed by Christ. There’s no perfect love until you’ve been loved by Christ. There’s no real joy unless you know the joy of the Lord. You can’t appreciate your beauty until you not only understand but, believe that God made you beautiful! Give this battle, this struggle to God. He will fight for you. He is the victor and will reign over the war that is raging in your heart and in your mind. And always remember: You are BEAUTIFUL. You are PRECIOUS. You are LOVED! You are a Child of the Light!

As for me, I believe one of these days I will be able to look at myself and find that I am beautiful; that I am worth more than what society tells me I need to be. One of these days I will believe others when they tell me I look good, or that I am beautiful. One of these days I will rise above this and rest in the promises of my Creator. One of these days, you will too! Until then, know that you, my friend, are beautiful and you’re not alone in this struggle.

Until then….

(For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be. (Psalm 139:13-16)

How He Loves Us – Kim Walker
Unfailing Love – Chris Tomlin
Coming Back to Life – Echoing Angels
Beautiful, Beautiful – Francesca Battestelli
Beautiful Things – Gungor
What Love Really Means – JJ Heller More Beautiful You – Jonny Diaz
All the Broken Pieces – Matthew West
Beautiful – MercyMe
Someone Worth Dying For – Mikeschair
Here in Your Presence – New Life Church
Hold Me Together – Royal Tailor Beloved – Tenth Avenue North
Beautifully Broken – This Beautiful Republic
You Won’t Relent – Vineyard Westside Worship